Ah, the breakup. If there’s one thing that’s universal in the language of love, it’s the sadness that comes with enduring a breakup. Let us start by saying, good for you for being strong and recognizing that that person was not your intended destiny and that moving on and living out the longevity of your sadness is healthy, important, and natural.
If you’re one of the lucky people enduring a civil break-up and the bulk of your sadness is a sweet sorrow that comes with a mutual parting of ways, you’re lucky! Confrontation of any kind has the potential to turn heinous quickly as there is a lot of emotion on the line, and this especially rings true with emotionally-charged romantic love. Be sad, let the sadness and pain pass through you. Don’t look for superficial outlets to suppress your sadness. Every sad day you let yourself suffer through is one less day of being sad on the other end.
If you’re one of the unlucky people enduring a breakup riddled with pain, drama, hurt, betrayal, etc. then it’s important you remember this one thing: let yourself feel whatever you need to in order to regain your strength. Do you think you hate them? Say the words out loud to yourself right now! Say “I hate ____.” As soon as you recognize that you have hatred stored within you for this person, you can begin to alleviate it to set yourself free. The more times you point out your hate to yourself, the closer you are to being free from it.
Do you think they are the ones who hate you? Did you royally mess up and hurt someone who had nothing but love for you? Forgive yourself. The first step in forgiving yourself is reflecting on the lesson you learned in your time together and from the parting itself. Learn from the mistake and forgive yourself for making it. If you make the mistake again, you need to recognize that you’re being emotionally negligent over and over again to people who have found it in themselves to love and accept you. At some point, you need to face yourself and actively make changes to stop yourself from hurting other people. Your resistance to pure love is unhealthy and needs to be faced once and for all.
Bottom line, a breakup has the potential to be an absolutely beautiful experience. When we cry, we’re express our raw emotion and it shakes our soul into feeling a love and passion that we often take for granted. The lessons that come from parting with romantic love are beautiful too, as they teach you about yourself, others, and the natural course of love around you. No matter how long you were together, how ugly the parting was, how much pain you’re enduring or what they did to you…you got this. You’re human, you can do anything! Rest peacefully knowing that every change of course brings you closer to a future of more love, happiness, and your true destiny.